Comatose Comma

A personification of a self-esteem lacking human being:

It’s not everyday that I write about senseless, non-existent object just to test my punctuation, and well, perhaps my grammar. I’m a crappy writer, it’s crappy, maybe even worse but believe me; contrariwise I don’t want to bore you—my dear, redundantly precious, and beloved only one reader—so I came up with an interesting story. Something you should really hear, whereas if you bring up your whole life story with you and simmer it down together in my boiling pot, you might be able to relate. It’s an epic something, truly interesting, and not to mention really captivating; It is certainly going to blow your brains out. Trust me.

…

Upon my intent of making this wasted moment of my petty and useless life count, I lied. I lied to you and everyone that constitutes the meaning of “you” and the conjoined-word-with-a-dash, meaning just-you (appositive) my only reader; I am blank.

I have nothing.

Having said that—that “I have nothing more to say”—I suppose I should leave now with a trailing dot-dot-dot, but that is semantically incorrect, so I’ll just leave behind my one comatose comma,

(Author: You don’t get it; it doesn’t make sense, I know. It’s not supposed to make sense. So you did well.)

Why the hell would you want to be evil?

Being evil does not always require a doctorate's degree in evilness, sometimes all you need is a pinch of voodoo dust mixed with cobwebs, a nasty pot, smelly shoe, and a wrench, which isn't rusted. Rusted is no good.

* You don't want to be non-evil.

* Because deep within, you know you want it.

* It's not without perks. You'll see.

* It's fun, for one.

* No fees included.

* You are curious about hell.

* You are not curious about heaven.

* Evil people always gets what they want.

* Exclusive gourmet to dreams of children.

* Free embalming fluid.

* Extreme excuse for drooling on Busty Asian Beauties.

* Party every night.

* without hangovers.

* Girls will crave for your undead attention.

* Yes, girls are insanely evil that way.

* Porsche 918 Spyder running on 500 hp V8

* with a really loud stereo.

The recipe of being evil is in your nature, and you know it. You are probably in the stage of denial right now, but you feel it creeping inside you, and soon it's going to eat its way out.

Temporarily Consecrated

I'm full-on evil this morning but they smite me.

So I have a certain degree of holiness for now. Hopefully it will pass and I can be evil again.