Ten craziest approaches

You ever been asked these questions? Made similar offers? Approached suchlike? You have got to be kidding me.

1. Funeral service agent asks. "Sir, have you considered where you'd want to spend the rest of eternity?"

2. He leaves you his card and a discount coupon.

3. Woman says, "Party tonight. I need a date." She's sixty years old.

4. Later that night, she says, "We should go somewhere private."

5. Your wife tells you, "Hun, you want threesome? ....no, she's not a girl."

6. Then you say, "Over my dead body!" Wife says, "I can help with that."

7. Wife added, "Jack's an attorney, too. Great then after you die, we transfer all your money to me."

8. Priest makes you a confession. You're a guy. The confession was intimate.

9. Someone offers you a drink. It was holy water.

10. Our agent from number one comes back saying, "We now offer free caskets, too. Have you made up your mind, sir?"